Spiritual Direction is a very different kind of space… different than anything I’d ever experienced! Not in friendship, counseling, or even in some of my most intimate or deeply connected dating relationships had I ever been listened to so intently.
I didn’t have any experience with Spiritual Direction until I began a Master’s program. Not a surprise… Spiritual direction has long been a well-established practice in Roman Catholic and other liturgical traditions, and while it’s historically been less common in many Protestant spaces, it’s now experiencing growing interest. Anyway, all students in that program were required to have a “Director” for the two years (quite brilliant). What a gift Jake was to me. I learned so much, and grew immensely. By graduation, I was hooked. I knew I’d always need a Director* moving forward, and felt a tug to explore becoming one myself.
The name is not exactly accurate for what it’s describing. A Director doesn’t really DIRECT anything, except maybe space and silence for listening, and essentially attention away from the Director (ironic) and toward the Spirit. For about an hour each month, we slow down and turn our gaze / heart / ears intently toward God (the True Director of our time, a candle lit to remind me), right in the middle of daily life. A Spiritual Director listens to their “Directee” prayerfully, tuned in to both the directee and the quiet movement of the Holy Spirit. Rather than offering advice or solutions, a trained Director reflects back what is shared and asks questions that open up new pathways of awareness.
This posture of deep listening that’s marked by curiosity, patience, and care helps both companions grow in their understanding of self and the Divine.
“That is really the direction in spiritual direction, as I understand it. As gently as possible, I try to say, ‘It seems as though the light is coming from over there,’ and I point to it, hoping that I don’t point in such a way that I block the person’s view.”
Susan Phillips, Candlelight
I love that quote. Because, in this way, spiritual direction becomes a practice of sacred noticing… discerning together the subtle invitations of God and learning to respond with trust, openness, and love.
My hope is that our time together creates space where you can be more real with yourself and be open to having God be more real to you.
Frequently Asked Questions
How much do you charge?
I don’t have a fee table. Many of my directees I brought on when I was a student. I am grateful for them, and do not charge. I do have a statement about being donation-based on my booking calendar. But there’s no pressure to pay. As I grow in hours and experience, that could change. For now, I feel like I receive as much as, if not more than, my directees do!
How do I start?
Begin by booking an exploratory session. This will help you discern if we’re a good fit, or if direction is what you’re looking for. You can also use the resources above to find a director who fits what you’re seeking.
Where can I find out more?
I often point my potential directees to Emily P. Freeman’s episode on Spiritual Direction for Beginners. I consider her to be a mentor, and this episode is an excellent primer.
So, this is like counseling?
Nope. See this list for help : )
In short... Spiritual Direction IS:
- A sacred space for listening and noticing God’s presence
- A slow, prayerful conversation grounded in trust and reverence
- A practice of discerning the movement of the Spirit together
- A companionship rooted in curiosity, not certainty
- A place to grow in awareness of self and the Divine
And... Spiritual Direction is not (and shouldn't replace):
- Therapy, counseling, or life coaching
- A place for fixing, advising, or solving problems
- An information-hub for spiritual queries and investigation
- A space led by my agenda, assumptions or “diagnoses”
Online search engines to find a Spiritual Director:
*When looking for a Director, it’s wise to ask… Do you meet regularly with a Spiritual Director yourself? Also… it’s okay and wise to ask… Are you under supervision or peer support for your practice? Have you received formal training in spiritual direction? If so, through what program or tradition? What does ongoing formation look like for you?